floating awareness

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Go to the source. I observe images being formed in consciousness and then how they translate into manifest reality. Where do these images originate? To whom do they appear? I feel how I allow energy to flow into those images, almost as a compulsion. I can hold back the energy with fine restraint and hold it in a place before it streams out into the outward-turned mind. It is like turning the handlebars of a bike 180 degrees and going back on the path I came and then staying there. This occurs at some times unexpectedly. I suddenly notice that I am holding the energy of manifestation in a place of “holding”, in a “holding zone”. Even the thought “I am noticing” feels like an intrusion at that moment (which is out of time). It is such, though, that the thought of noticing doesn’t disturb that state of “holding”.

Consciousness as the force of manifestation of all forms and images is in a ‘stasis’ – free of impatience and full of satisfaction to just ‘be’. All of the methods that I have mastered do not bring about this state, but may have contributed to its appearing seemingly spontaneously – I don’t know. I do know that it is necessary for me to remain in this 360 degree ‘floating awareness’ of how the conditioned stream of consciousness that is fed by memory goes through “its thing”. Only in this alertness and fine-tuned observation of the whole process of ‘consciousness’ does the ‘stasis’ occur. In this sense, the Zen masters are right: there is no practice and there is only practice.

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