having nothing to do

I practice having nothing to do. I do things, but… they are spontaneous; they are not pre-meditated. They are simply what is to be done in the normal sequence of things. After the meal I take out the compost to the compost pile. When I go into the back bathroom I clean the kitty litter box. Things like that.

Thoughts about what I should do to fulfill my purpose in life or to complete the mission that I took on before I incarnated simply do not occur to me. My close friends and my wife speak of such things but I seem to work differently. Only yesterday did it dawn on me that I simply am not cut out for such thoughts and intentions. My psycho-somatic system just isn’t up to the task of intending any change whatsoever in the way things are. Maybe it has to do with my belief that to accept all changes is the most logical thing to do and then to meet these changes in a way that is loving to yourself and others.

Additionally, I seem to simply not have the capacity to do more than be present with all that life brings to me. In my experience the intensity that occurs when I live the way I do requires my full mind-boy-spirit complex and I am fulfilled. How others are able to be with each situation in presence and additionally engage in visioning and manifesting their desires is beyond me. It is clear to me that each of us has different potentials and that we actually function differently. I finally have admitted to myself that it is not for me to live any other way than I have been as I have no desire to apply myself to anything other than being present moment by moment in my own way.

The main point as I see it is to really and honestly be at peace with yourself. From this place of peace in meeting with myself I seem to be recognizing how everyone else is just at the right place and that they are doing, thinking and feeling exactly the right way as is suitable for them the way they are.

“Behold, it is I.”

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